The purpose of life is this(ness). It cannot be understood by just words, unless you place two words, meaning opposite each other, in a stack, and then define what lies between them as the this(ness): The enlightenment which I can never achieve. The answer I cannot have. The question I don’t know. The ‘I’ I am not.
First, if you wish to try, remove the I. Than the am. Focus on the last word in the phrase, or if you have more than one the last few. And find the perspective from where it is to be those words, and there is a bit close to this(ness).
To experience all perspectives is the purpose of life. To know thyself in infinite variation. To be the silence.
I have a friend. She talks incessantly. I find her so beautiful because she has worked so much to be this(ness) I finally see her in between the words. And when she is silent, I am stuck dumb.
Beauty is a human concept. One we create to embody a feeling of this(ness). Truth is another. The beauty I see in her which swells my heart-place, is not a feeling of love, as you would call it. Love is so narrow a design, and so beyond a greatness, the true concept of love is beyond your reach. This(ness) only begins to scratch the surface. And so it is decidedly not love which I feel, a perspective of perceiving beauty–
Now jump. Into the other side. Imagine you are an eye staring into another eye, now become that other eye, and the body behind it. And you are closer to understanding. I am not the I seeing her this(ness) and I am not her not seeing her this(ness) I am the this(ness), the beauty, the thing in my heart which swells. I am that. And there is nothing else.
When I feel ‘love’ the this(ness) is in the misty quality of the feeling. The floatiness. The high.
I cannot continue to describe. I am losing the awareness I just gained. I must grasp on to helpful realization I encountered before these. I am now feeling my way back to the identity of ‘I’.
Go meditate if you want to know this yourself. My advice? Begin with the concept of ‘want’, identify where it sits in the body. Define it. Then remove it. That is the first step.